Sunday, November 20, 2011

COD MW3 Is Real?!

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With the latest release of Call Of Duty, Modern Warfare 3, has come hundreds of endless lines as tireless nerds wait for their own copy of the game. Or so it was assumed.... Also released was Skyrim, which seemingly stole all of the "loyal" COD nerds and began to lay down it's own legacy. Yet little known amongst this chaos is the truth behind COD MW3. Why is it called "Call" of duty first off?? Warped Reality Headquarters searched into this game to reveal the shocking truth.

Connected to each copy of Call of Duty is a microscopic chip which transmits data to and from NATO and United States troops stationed around the world. The lonely nerd in his parents basement believes he is controlling a simulated character in a faux world; he is far from correct. Each control in the game is directly synced with the movements of a real life soldier.

Yeah, that's right! You remember when you noob-tubed your teammate?? He was in the news that other day. And remember that quickscope you got last night?? Well you were controlling a master sniper. The game doesn't seem so innocent anymore, DOES IT?!

The United States government, NATO, and international armed forces have put their strategies in combat in the hands of the lonely nerd in his parents basement. People just like Varun Ramesh are unknowingly placed into the position of Commander of armed forces, where they are trusted with leading their brigades to victory. The other dark side of the game?? There is NO respawn... Remember when you were grenaded that one day from behind that wall?? Bet you feel pretty bad now.

We, at Warped Reality Headquarters, off our most humble condolences to the fallen veterans and noobs alike.

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